Quick to Calm: Women Set the Emotional Temperature of Relationships

ImageWomen who quickly calm down quickly during or shortly following an argument tend to have happier marriages. Men follow the women’s lead during an argument – if she calms down, he calms down. If she stays hot, so does he.

“There’s a power dynamic in any dyad (pair)”, said the study’s lead author Lian Bloch, assistant professor at the Pacific Graduate School of Psychology Stanford Consortium. So when couples argue, she says, “Both are looking to her as the emotional thermometer of how things are going. Women take more responsibility for emotional harmony in marriage.”

But before an argument starts, stop and think – is it really worth it? Another study found that older couples with happy marriages tend to avoid having conversations about touchy topics. If they do talk about those touchy topics, they do so with warmth and humor. Here’s more tips on keeping the peace from WebMD. Of note: Go to bed angry. Maybe even in separate beds (you’ll get better sleep).


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