Most women who have dated around a bit have probably experienced at least one “slow fade” – a boyfriend who melts away rather than simply breaking off the relationship. My first real slow fade was a police officer cadet who I met through eHarmony (The best website to meet a slow fader, FYI). The relationship escalated quickly and then….he disappeared. For four days I thought he was dead in a ditch. He finally answered one of my frantic phone calls and after a short, awkward conversation wherein I asked if it was over, ended the relationship.
Why do men DO that?!
Some interesting points to consider:
- Men tend to fall in love more readily than women
- Women are more likely to sense problems in the relationship prior to a breakup
- Men are more likely than women to want to break up if their partner was unfaithful
- Women adjust better to long distance relationships than men
- Women tend to fall out of love faster than men and are more likely to initiate a breakup if they don’t see it working out long term
- Men cope better with breakup if they’re the ones who initiated it, whereas women suffer equally whether they initiated it or not
- Men and women are likely to experience the same level of distress after a breakup, but women handle it better OR women reported more often than men feeling sad, confused and scared. (Research is conflicting)
- Women are better able to cope with rejection
Still no answer as to why men more than women choose the slow fade breakup method, but at least Buzzfeed has a post on The 14 states of Accepting a Slow Fade Breakup.